1 John 3:10-18
Preached 2/25/2024 [Previous Sermon]
INTRODUCTION
Back when I was in elementary school I remember attending a school assembly with my mom where some drama students were doing a short play. Part of the play involved a boy who was madly in love with a girl. He was comically portrayed as being so smitten that he didn’t care about anything else and was only interested in doing things to please her. He was obsessed. I remember making fun of the concept when my mom turned to me and predicted “some day you will be like that”. “Ha!”, I thought with my 6th grade mind, “that’ll be the day!” Well, my mother was right. In seventh grade I was surprised to see a new life-form had invaded my junior high that I had never seen before. By high school I had been through a couple of crushes (sadly) when, suddenly, one liked me back. (?!?!?!) Suddenly I became the guy in that 6th grade play. 6th grade me looked away in contempt at what I had become, but I had it bad. So I married her, (at least when she decided that she could tolerate my weirdness). But all of the signs of love manifested: the mental obsession, the desire to be with her all the time, the desire to please her (and a puppy-like joy when I succeeded in making her smile), loneliness when we were apart, and constant thoughts about our joyful future together. Like the flu, love has symptoms. And anyone who knew me could diagnose the malady I was suffering from without the help of as psychologist with the DSM-5.
In his first epistle, the apostle John has been giving his own DSM manual for self-diagnosis of our spiritual condition. And his three main areas of symptoms are, as we have been discussing, in three categories: social, doctrinal, and moral. In the previous sermon we went through a moral test, in chapter 3 verses 4 through 9 he talked about our practice of righteousness, or the moral test. In verse ten he switches to another area of symptoms:
1 John 3:10 By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.
Here he finishes the section on righteousness and moved to the subject of love. This is, of course, not the first time he has mentioned love in this letter. In chapter two verses seven through eleven, John spoke of love as a new commandment which was also an old commandment. Now in chapter three he comes back to the social test – the love test. And he will come back to the love test again, spending most of chapter four talking about love, its origins, its symptoms, and its ramifications. It is not for nothing that some call John the apostle of love. And it is really that important. Why? Well, let’s get into the text and see for ourselves:
I The Ultimate Command (3:11):
Like in the previous section John starts with God and his will for our lives. He echoes 2:7 here to announce that he has returned to the subject of love between Christians.
1 John 3:11 For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.
The beginning in this context is the beginning of Jesus’ public ministry. John is not talking about something new. And yet, even before this there was a previous commandment to love. In Matthew 22 we read a story where an expert in the law posed an important question to Jesus. He asked:
Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”
In other words, Jesus points out that every single commandment comes down to love – love for God or love for your neighbor. Any breaking of the law shows a deficiency in one of these loves. And as Paul told the Corinthians, without love nothing we do is ultimately of any value. And Jesus expanded this second law, to love your neighbor, to the entire human race. Everyone who needs a blessing that you can give. And He explicitly added that his disciples should even love their enemies. So this old commandment that they already had before Jesus was very hardcore already. So what was the new commandment? Jesus told his disciples to love one another.
This new command was not instead of the commandment to love your neighbor. This was an entirely different kind of love. He went so far as to describe it as the defining characteristic of a true disciple. In John chapter 17 the apostle records Jesus’ high-priestly prayer in
John 17:20-21 “I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”
His kingdom will be one big, happy, unified, forever family. And the power of God, when it made them into a new creation, would put something like a magnet in each one of them that would bind them together for eternity.
Looking back at chapter two, we see that John described this love like he described everything else: in black and white terms. Love for your brother is something, John said, that you either do have or that you do not have. There is no half love in his theology, because he is not talking about feelings but a supernatural reality that is either there or is not there. John wrote:
1 John 2:9 Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.
Why did John say this? Because Jesus had told them all – at the last supper – that
John 13:35 “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
So John did not make up this test on a whim. Jesus is the originator of this test. Jesus also tended to speak of love in strong terms. In the sermon on the mount Jesus taught that murder was just the ultimate expression of the sin of hate. Someone who comes to God and says “look how good I am! I never murdered anyone!” will have their heart revealed to them by the One who knows all, where he or she will see that they have murdered people in their hearts many thousands of times. They fantasize about revenge against rude strangers, they lash out and wound with words, they pass by those who need their help because of anger or pride. They look down on people and call them names. Murder is just the part of an iceberg that extends about the surface of the sea. Underneath is a hazard that can sink even the Titanic. Jude writes about false Christians in the church that are like “hidden reefs” in their communion services – unnoticed because, for a while, they act like part of the group. Why do these people, that John calls “antichrists” leave? Because they are not born again inside. They do not, in the end, love the brethren.
II The Ultimate Contrast (3:12-18):
So in verses 12 through 18 John will now describe this ultimate contrast, between the people of God’s kingdom and the kingdom of the world. Like Jesus John uses two words that seem extreme to us, love and hate, but we must understand what these terms mean in a biblical context. Love is of course that which wants the ultimate good for all objects of that love. Paul eloquently states
1 Corinthians 13:4-8a Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
Hate, on the other hand, is a state of selfishness and disreguard for others. Hate as God uses the word does not just mean wishing someone were tortured and killed. Hate, when combined with love, indicates a preference through contrast. Jesus told Nicodemus that “God so loved the world that He gave his only Son”. But when chosing Jacob, scripture tells us “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.” (Romans 9:13) This means that God had chosen Jacob to be in the Messianic line and not Esau. Esau still lived well on this earth during his time, but God gave special grace to Jacob. In the same way we are to love the people in the world but not the world. When Jesus said that “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26) He was not ending the command to “honor your father and mother” or calling for suicide. We can still love our parents and life itself for all of its gifts, but we must never have an idolatrous love for anything above Him. It is that kind of Hate that John will now talk about, for in this section he is going to contrast Hate versus love so that we can understand that which should be in all believers. And for each he will give us an example that illustrates just what God wants us to understand about them.
IIA Example 1: The One Who Killed (3:12-15):
The first example that John gives us is the first instance of murder in the history of the human race – Cain, the son of Adam.
1 John 3:12 We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother's righteous.
Here were literal brothers – the first ever to exist – and one hated the other so much that he killed him. John gives us some insight into the motives of Cain here, although indirectly. Remember from the history in the book of Genesis, these two brothers called upon the name of the Lord and offered sacrifices to Him. It can be inferred that they had already been informed of the importance of blood in a sacrifice for sin. Abel offered a sacrifice of an animal from his flocks, but Cain wanted to be unique and come up with his own way to approach God.
When the offering was rejected, Cain had many options. He could learn from his mistake and search his soul to see if it was right before God. He could ask God why his offering had been rejected. He could do an appropriate offering, realizing what the symbolism of the offering was. If he loved God and loved his brother, any of these options would have prevented them. But John tells us that Cain’s deeds were evil. He was not offering the sacrifice that God wanted, in the way that God had demonstrated. He wanted recognition for his great piety and creativity. He wanted to be recognized as the most religious member of the family. And because Abel had been declared more righteous than him bit into him like a cancer.
Genesis tells us that at this point God Himself spoke to Cain, giving him a serious warning about the state of his soul and the anger in his heart. He said:
Genesis 4:6b-7 “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is contrary to you, but you must rule over it.”
God saw into his heart, which was forming into a ball of hatred. Murder was there, though it was not yet realized in action. Cain had a wonderful opportunity to get right with his Creator. But he wanted to do it his own way, or not at all. He was jealous of Abel. Paul told the Corinthian church that as Christians “..we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life.” (2 Cor 2:15-16a) To those who were right with God through faith and obedience, Abel’s piety was a beautiful thing. But to Cain it was a stink. It filled him with bitterness and jealousy. So he ignored God’s warning and acted out his hate, killing his own brother. The first murder happened, and the ground drank the blood of the first human to die after the fall of man.
Thus Cain becomes the example of what a believer should not look like. Remember that John is illustrating what it means to obey the command to love your brother, and this example shows us why. It is natural to have fellowship with those whose spiritual state is the same as ours. Before we were saved, we were spiritually dead, and the only people that we had anything in common with spiritually were others who were also dead. Something about believers rubbed us the wrong way. Like most, the idea formed in our minds of people who thought that they were somehow better than us. But when we were saved, we were adopted into a new family. We became part of the body of Christ. We were given a new destiny. What does John tell us next? Look at verse 13:
1 John 3:13 Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you.
Why does he say this? Because our family ties have changed. God has in Christ “has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son” (Col 1:12-13a). The word “fellowship” used in the New Testament translates the Greek word koinōnia, which describes the relationship between people who have something in common. It signifies a common belonging, a membership, joint participation, inter-relationships, community, and intimacy. In the context of a Christian it signifies something stronger and more permanent than even blood relations. And Paul asks poignantly: “… what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.” If we are a Christian, we are eternally joined to Christ. The world will never forgive us for this.
Unfortunately this kind of attitude can happen in a local church. People love to do their “religion thing” but other people’s devotion seems like “too much” or “over the top”. Or maybe they just have so much to do in the world, or maybe too many hobbies and interests that take their time away from Jesus and his church. They resent other church members because they seem “too rigid” or “holier than thou”. Or maybe they are legalistic and resent the other people’s joyous freedom in Christ. They may run from church to church, building up stories of the terrible people that they met in the last church to tell people in the next church, until they find someone in that church that makes them mad. So they move on again, or just stop going to church, but not before lobbing some hand grenades of division through the window on the way out and take others with them. Or maybe they just find reasons to stop going. It stops being reasonable things like “I was sick on Sunday” or “I had work” and changes slowly to “I can watch the service online” and “oh, we don’t do prayer meetings, it interferes with family movie night” or “I can’t come to the bible study because I am up too late on Saturday night.” If challenged to reconsider, they react with anger – how dare you!
But John says that with believers it should not be that way. If Christ has put his Spirit into you, that magnet will draw you towards your local church. We will love and not have the kind of hate that is loving less. He writes:
1 John 3:14-15 14 We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. 15 Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.
One other application from these verses is important to Jesus’ family everywhere. There is a saying in the world that “blood is thicker than water”. Unfortunately, the one thing that will split up God’s family faster than anything else is when this is applied to spiritual fellowship. Jesus said that if we don’t love Him more than our earthly relatives we can’t be his disciples. But when “blood is thicker than water” becomes “blood is thicker than the Spirit of God that made us into one body” then we get the situation where families become factions. And factions are evil. Just like “I am of Paul” and “I am of Apollos” we can become “I am of Pastor Frank” vs “I am of the Smith Family that has been going to this church for decades”. So many church splits start this way. In fact, just about every church split starts this way. All it takes is for one person to not get their way or one unkind word to be spoken and an entire family just cuts all ties and walks out. Years ago I remember hearing one such person, when confronted with the truth of a quarrel, say “you don’t expect me to turn against my relative, do you?” Sometimes all it takes is one careless word for people to throw away ten, twenty, thirty, or more years of close fellowship and service to the Lord for family pride. We know that we have passed out of death into life, John says, because we love the brothers. It’s not always easy according to the flesh, but John tells us that it is what saved people do.
IIB Example 2: The One Who Died (3:16-18):
It is never good to give only a bad example, so in verse sixteen John switches to a good example, and by good, we mean best!
1 John 3:16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers
So Who should be our example for the kind of love we have for our brothers and sisters in Christ? John tells us to look to the Lord Jesus Christ Himself. I know this seems to be almost a trivial example because it is so obvious, but it really is the only example that God gives us with explicit instructions to become like Him. Of course it is good to find someone whose example we may be encouraged by here in the family of God, but only inasmuch as they reflect Jesus. Realize in advance that that person in the pew next to you may seem to have an untarnished and amazing spiritual life, but they will let you down. They may stumble, or they may hurt your feelings. You can count on it, as you come regularly to this hospital for victims of this dark world. And no matter how hard you try, you will end up stepping on someone else’s toes. And if I haven’t yet, I will probably let you down, too.
But what does it make you do? What is your first instinct when it happens? Does it make you want to leave? Does your love grow cold? Do you start to resent the joy of others that you don’t feel deserve it? Or do you do like Paul wrote to the Colossians:
Col 3:12-15 Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.
That seems like a lot, perhaps. It is not the way that we generally behave as humans. But if you look at it differently, it becomes a shining source of hope. What if… what if someone clumsily (or even with malice) says something that stabs you right in a hurt that you have, for instance. What if you said to yourself “wow! God has given me an opportunity that I didn’t have a few minutes ago to go in the power of Jesus and return good for evil, to love that person, to be a lookalike of Jesus and bless their socks off. Jesus, please take this hurt in my heart and turn it into love. Let me use this as an opportunity to make the body of Christ stronger in this local church.” Question: does this sound exciting or unreasonable? That is a good gauge of where your heart is. Don’t worry, I’m not there either, yet. Please help me to try to attain to that and I promise to help you, or try to, at least. After all, our example made the ultimate sacrifice for those whose hearts were turned against him and hated Him:
Philippians 2:5-8 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Well then, since we have such a great high priest, how can we not do likewise for Him? Shall we offer half-service to Him who sacrificed more than we will ever be able to understand because He desired to have fellowship with us?
As a final thought, John turns again to his example. We love to sing songs about how much we love Jesus and our fellow Christians. But John tells us, in so many words, “talk is cheap”:
1 John 3:17-18 But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.
This reminds me of why I put the example of my own earthly romance at the beginning of the sermon. Like the boy in the play that I saw as a kid, when I fell in love with my sweetheart it showed. I talked about her, I called her on the phone (back when we had to stand within range of the family phone in the kitchen to talk). I spent many hours thinking about what our lives would be (long before I got around to proposing to her). I got to know her friends and even her family (both scary for an introvert like me). Why? Because of love. And if I was tried in a court for being a fool in love, they would have had no trouble getting enough evidence to convict me and lock me up. And that evidence was there before I got up the nerve to actually tell her that I loved her. Could we be convicted of having love for the brethren?
Conclusion
It’s nice to hear someone say “I love you”. It’s even better, though, to actually be loved by someone. John told us that we know love because Jesus loved us. Note that He did NOT say that we know love because Jesus said “I love you”.
No.
We KNOW love because Jesus “laid down his life for us”. Not just his life. Also, his privilege. His status. His dignity. His unbroken perfect eternal relationship with his Father. Why? Why did He do it for me? Because He wanted to have fellowship with me? To me, who knows me, that seems to be absurd. What do I possibly bring to the table that He would ever want? I don’t know.
But…
if He can do that for me, maybe I can stand being around others that are foolish, who are weak, not wise according to worldly standards, not powerful, not of noble birth, those who are low and despised in the world, like me, to celebrate my redemption by the One who gave his life for me. (Those were Paul’s descriptions, not mine – 1 Cor 1).
Maybe I can find the time to participate in a local fellowship of believers, without checking my watch to see if I am late for that other thing I like to do. Maybe I can set my alarm earlier and study God’s marvelous word with my brothers and sisters in Christ. Maybe I can find someone to minister to this week with that particular spiritual gift that God gave me to build up the church. Maybe I can be that dependable brother that someone else is encouraged to see when they are able come and are looking for something constant in their life..
It could happen. It should happen. It must happen.
Jesus is my good example. He loves his people. Not just with words, but with deeds.
I pray I can love them better, starting this week. Not just with words, but with deeds.
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